Does Vulnerability In Relationship Strengthen It?

“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou

When I read this quote, memories flashed past and all I could remember was how I had felt, no memory of what the argument was about or who said what, all I could remember were the emotions coursing through me. I couldn’t help but agree with what this amazing lady has said.

When we talk about relationships, what we usually think of is the sacrifices, commitment, adjustment, love, etc. The one thing we don’t give a thought to is, of them as a vulnerable individual with the same insecurities and emotions that we might have. Every time there is a misunderstanding we start recounting the ways they have hurt us and the sacrifices we have made to make this relationship stronger and I am sure the other party is thinking the same. If both are thinking the same and both are right, then who is wrong?

Self preservation, has been our basic survival instinct and however, evolved we humans think we are when under attack we all revert to this instinct. As humans, the one weapon we use the most is our tongue and we lash out at the other person with all the might and we attack their weakest point. Our whole point being, make them retreat and when this happens we destroy not just the relationship but the person too. They may later forgive you and forget what the argument was all about but, they will never forget how they felt right at that very moment. So how can we declare to the world that we love that person, or that we sacrificed to make the relationship stronger if what we just did was slowly destroyed that person’s self-worth?

Love is all about knowing the persons weakest point and safeguarding it when you are at your, most vulnerable state. Relationships are built when 2 people can trust each other and be vulnerable with each other without the fear of those vulnerabilities being used as a weapon.

Next time someone trusts you by being vulnerable, guard them with your life and that relationship will withstand every test of time!